Wait, I Picked 7 of the Elite 8 in my Bracket?

Back in college my nickname was Robbie Mush, because every bet I made turned to mush. It was a reference to a minor character in A Bronx Tale, Eddie Mush, who at the track was given his bet-tickets already ripped up.

That's why last night I was absolutely stunned to see that I had picked 7 of the 8 teams that made the Elite Eight. The only exception being Wichita State. My brackets started off as red as anyone's but somehow I guessed the teams that would advance to this stage. Here's my bracket:

I used almost no logic to pick these teams. I don't follow NCAA hoops until the start of March, and I know little about the game, its teams, or its players. I used a few basic guidelines to fill this bracket out in less than a minute:

1. Despite early upsets, the Final Four and Elite Eight are dominated by teams seeded 1-4.

2. The 1 seeds are 1 by default, not because they are clearly superior to other teams.

3. I hate Syracuse. Which means they'll probably advance far.

4. Duke doesn't mess around when they have something to play for.

Somehow a combination of these guidelines along with the dumbest of luck has produced a bracket in the 99th percentile on Yahoo.

My Final Four are Duke, Ohio State, Michigan, and Syracuse. I have Michigan defeating Duke 65-55 in the Championship.

And I don't even care. I am much more interested in the NCAA Hockey tournament.

I Hate the Phrase "Punched Their Ticket"

This is the time of year when I become obsessed with basketball. The other 11 months I don't really care about the sport. At least not as much as football, hockey, baseball, soccer, curling, et cetera. But in March I can't get enough of the game. The mid-majors, the upsets, the buzzer beaters. The MVC, the OVC, the WCC, the ACC, the Atlantic 10, the Big Ten, the Big XII, the Big East. It's a relentless barrage of tension and thrills.

However, there is one thing about this time of year that threatens to give me a rage-induced conniption...

The phrase "punched their ticket," and all associated forms.

It's such a tired, worn-out, overused, out-of-date, unoriginal, uninteresting sports cliche. You hear it and read it constantly, in highlight reels and game recaps. "Florida Gulf Coast was the first team to punch their ticket," "Belmont punched their ticket for the third straight year," "Harvard punched their ticket because there's no tournament in the Ivy League," "Liberty punched their ticket despite 20 losses." Every conference tournament is another ticket punched. So many tickets. So many punches. So many times this same phrase is used.

The problem is, there's no other quick and colorful way to say "earned a berth in the NCAA tournament."

We must come up with another phrase. This level of repetition is unacceptable for a writer. Not to mention how out-of-date the phrase is. How often do you have a ticket that's punched these days? Here are some suggested replacements:

"Won a berth" is the most basic substitute. Although there's no flare to that. And in Sportswriting 101, future sports media are instructed to use as many formulaic, hackneyed expressions as possible, in an effort to make their writing appear interesting (see: "three-point land")

"Penetrated the bubble." I'm not sure this makes much sense, as most teams that win conference tourneys aren't bubble teams. But it sounds good. And kind of dirty.

"Date with 68." I like this, even though teams would technically have a date with 67 teams. It rhymes, it's catchy, and you can still use it when the Tournament expands to 128 teams.

"Cashed in." There's lots of money to be made by an NCAA appearance. And for USC's basketball program, this phrase is especially appropriate.

"Stamped their name on the bracket." Kind of long, but it's clear, active, and more up-to-date.

"Earned a slash." This can be used for teams that will be forced to go through one of the play-in games. Liberty, with their 20 losses, definitely earned a slash.

These are the humble suggestions of one sports fan who likes to write, and who hates hearing the same stupid phrases over and over again. I'm sure the truly great sportswriters out there, if there are any, can come up with something better. If only they tried to do so.

-The Captain

I Can't Wait For The NCAA Tournament

Honestly, has anything been better than the NCAA regular season this year?

You can pretty much guarantee that there will be at least one top 10 upset every weekend/ week. I have never seen anything like this before in my life Indiana, Michigan, Duke, Miami, Louisville and Syracuse all didn't want to be the number 1 seed. But they are extremely tough teams.

With Kentucky probably not tournament bound with Noel hurt and with them being unable to come together, I am probably going to have Michigan and Miami going far. I like Michigan a lot due to their playmakers and the fact half of their starters are related to some NBA player(Hardaway Jr, Horford and Robinson III), despite their embarrassing loss to Penn State, I still think this team has the potential to make some noise in later March.

Also, I have bought completely into Miami. Yes, they just lost to Duke, but Ryan Kelly decided to be the greatest player of all time and Miami missed some huge opportunities to win. Half of their squad are seniors or 5th year seniors. They have playmakers and then have an inside player in Reggie Johnson (who had an awful Duke game). They have the experience, the tenacity and skill to make it to at least the elite eight or final four.

This year has just been so awesome from an unbiased fan (because Kentucky is out of it) and there is zero percent chance that anyone is going to have a great bracket.

Don't Look Now.....

But Kentucky just had their arrival party by beating number 16 Ole Miss last night.

Kentucky is a weird team, they have no leadership and no veterans on the team. Calipari has too many cooks in the kitchen this year, a lot of great individual freshman but not a good TEAM. Nerlens Noel is good (Not Anthony Davis, but good), Alex Poythress is great, Archie Goodwin and Ryan Harrow are great individual players but they don't have a Darius Miller or the team effort given to them by MKG or Anthony Davis on a nightly basis, their guard play is atrocious and are extremely inconsistent. They can make some noise in the tourney.

The thing with this tournament compared to ones in the past, is I have zero clue who is the number 1 team. We have seen Indiana, Duke, Louisville, Syracuse and now Michigan be ranked number 1 and not be able to hold it together. I can't wait for March Madness because it is going to be so unpredictable and fun.